


(Who's the Monkey) Who's the Mayor?

by yehwellwhatever



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), American Idol RPF, David Cook (Musician), The Anthemic
Genre: Embarrassment, Established Relationship, M/M, Power Play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-04
Updated: 2012-07-04
Packaged: 2017-11-09 04:00:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/451020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yehwellwhatever/pseuds/yehwellwhatever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neal isn't putting those on. No way, no how. Or is he?</p>
            </blockquote>





	(Who's the Monkey) Who's the Mayor?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mmmfelicious](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mmmfelicious/gifts).



> Thanks to daisiesdaily @ LJ for the beta. Any remaining mistakes are my own.
> 
> Title taken from _My shirt looks good on you_ by Catie Curtis.

“No!” And again Adam just looks at him, Neal hates it when he does that. Even more so when he adds those eyes, and that pout. “I said no, damn it.”

“But come on, it’ll be fun! You know it will.” Neal knows he will give in eventually when Adam gets all up in his space like that. Really, it’s never even a question if he will or not when Adam’s hand goes right _there_.

“Fun for you, maybe,” Neal says, his voice low. “Keep your hands to yourself, Lambert.” He has to resort to bringing his hands up like a shield, keeping whatever it is that Adam’s holding in his hand away from his body.

Everyone thinks that Neal is the submissive one in their relationship, and really, how could they not after all those interviews and random comments from Adam about how he likes the top? Neal really doesn’t need to add fuel to that fire, his manliness can only take so much. _He_ won’t be putting this on, no way, no how.

“You know you’ll look fucking hot,” Adam says, breathing hot against Neal’s ear, making Neal shudder. “You’re always fucking hot, but just imagine what you will look like after I’m done with you.”

“Oh, I’m imagining alright…” Neal says with a sigh. “There is no way in hell you’re gonna get that _thing_ on me.”

“Don’t be such a baby.” Adam huffs, and Neal can tell he’s getting impatient. Good. “You know you like it.”

“On _you_ , sure, on me, not so much.” Neal instinctively backs away when Adam brings his hand up to his face, in turn walking himself into a corner. Great, now he really has nowhere to go.

“Looks like you’ve walked yourself into a corner there, literally,” Adam says, chuckling as he arches a perfectly shaped eyebrow. “Now are you gonna put these on so we won’t be missing the whole thing?”

“There is no way I’ll fit into those _things_!” Neal protests, pointing at the pants in Adam’s hand. “And that, that’s just too much glitter!”

“Come on now, it’s a fancy dress party. Besides, you can never have too much glitter.” Adam rolls his eyes as he sets the glittery make up down on the kitchen counter. “Am I going to have to undress you myself?”

“Not if you want us to leave anytime soon, you’re not.” Neal eyes the pants warily. “Are they latex, really, Adam, _latex_?”

“Well, yes,” Adam says, looking at Neal as if he’s thinking, _“Do you have a problem with that?”_

“How am I even gonna get them on?” Neal regrets the question as soon as the last word has left the tip of his tongue.

“Potato flour,” Adam says, like that’s got anything to do with anything. Sometimes Neal wonders if his boyfriend was dropped on his head as a baby.

“What? You’re gonna make pasta now? You were the one who wanted to go to this thing in the first place.” Neal snorts. “Not that I mind, but you know how Kris gets when someone breaks a promise…”

Adam huffs, and there’s that look in his eyes that he uses when he thinks Neal is being stupid. “To get your pants on. Use the potato flour to get them on easier.” The _duh_ on the end is definitely implied.

“Adam, man,” Neal says, trying to bite back laughter. “I think you mean baby powder. Even if I do get them on, it’ll show everything, and I mean _everything_. I won’t be able to sit down, they’ll rip.”

The look Adam gives him is nothing but suggestive. “Baby, that’s the whole point.” He even wiggles his eyebrows a little. Neal definitely should’ve seen that one coming.

“You want me to rip my pants, which I won’t be able to wear any underwear, I might add, in front of a whole room of our friends and people we’ve never met?” Neal pauses for a second, taking in Adam’s reaction. He saw the way Adam’s eyes darkened with lust, the way he licked his lips as he looked up and down the frame of Neal’s body. “I’m not sure I’m completely comfortable with that.”

“Oh, don’t give me that,” Adam says with a huff. “I’ve seen you dressed in worse, this is nothing. I’ll make it worth your while…” The look in Adam’s eyes is nothing if not seductive, and he is right. There was this one time where he… _No_ , he’s not going there, not even in his own mind.

“That was in private, though… this is not.” Neal can feel himself blushing, and knows what would happen if it got out. He’d never live it down. The look in Adam’s eyes tells him that his boyfriend knows what he’s thinking, and he will use it against him. “Okay,” he says with a sigh. “I’ll do it.”

“I knew you’d see the light, baby,” Adam says, laughter in his voice. “Do you need help, or do you think you can manage by yourself?”

“I’ll do it myself.” Neal snatches the pants out of Adam’s hand, glaring at him. “You just make yourself nice and pretty, princess. As you said, we don’t want to be late.” He can hear Adam laugh as he closes the door to their bedroom.

***

So, it turns out Neal was wrong. He can sit down in the impossibly tight pants, and they were easier to get on than he’d thought. One thing he was right about, though, was that there was no way in hell he’d be able to fit any type of underwear under them.

“See, I told you they’d fit perfectly.” Adam strokes the inside of his thigh teasingly, eyes on the road. “You should trust me more often.”

“Yeah,” Neal says, snorting. “Because that works out _so well_ every single time.” He shifts in his seat, trying to get comfortable but failing. Neal already knows he’ll regret that he let himself get talked into wearing them. Hell, he already does.

Adam laughs, actually throws his head back against the neck rest and _laughs_. “Oh, baby, you know you enjoyed it every one of those times. You’ll enjoy tonight too. Just you wait.”

Neal spends the rest of the ride to Kris’ house in silence, occasionally glaring at Adam out of the corner of his eye. This is gonna be enjoyable indeed, _not_.

***

There’s a slight breeze as they get out of the car, and Neal can feel _everything_ , every gust of wind as they head up to Kris’ front door. It’s unusually quiet for a party, but then again this is Kris, it’s not that surprising.

Neal’s not sure how he feels about that though. On the one hand that will mean that there’s not a lot of people there to mock him - Neal knows there will be mocking - on the other hand, if there had been a lot of people, he could’ve blended in more easily. As easily as you could possibly blend in, in clothes like these anyway. Either way, he’s really happy he managed to convince Adam that he wouldn’t need any make up.

Adam grabs his hand, startling him out of his thoughts. “You look fine,” he says, his lips brushing the shell of Neal’s ear as he speaks. “In fact, you look amazing. We might need to find the guest room.” Neal shudders and tells himself it’s the breeze, and that he was shaken out of his thoughts. It has absolutely nothing to do with what Adam just said.

The door opens just seconds after Neal can hear the sound of the bell ringing. But it’s not Kris at the door, it’s Cassidy. Neal sighs at the sight, at least if it had been Kris he could’ve gotten a few moments to prepare himself. No such luck.

“Well, well, well,” Cassidy says, and Neal doesn’t even have to look at him to know he’s being oogled. “You sure clean up nicely, Neal, I must say.” He can’t help but glare at Adam then. “Very nicely,” Neal can hear Cassidy add under his breath as they enter the house.

Things don't exactly ease up when they get into the living room. Not only is Kris’ entire band there, _and_ Adam’s, Cook is there with Archie in his lap, and Andy comes out of the kitchen with Kris in tow. When Andy notices him, Neal is almost afraid that he will drop the tray of whatever he’s holding in his hands. He just stands there and gawks for what feels like forever.

“Stop staring, Skib,” Adam says, his voice harsher than Neal thinks is warranted, this is Andy after all. Neal hasn’t seen him happier than what he’s been since he started seeing Kris.

“I… I… ehhh…” Andy stutters, still looking a little too intently at Neal’s crotch. “What the hell are you wearing?” he gets out eventually.

His reaction grabs the attention of the rest of the room. Not for the first time since meeting Adam does Neal want nothing more than to have the ability to make himself invisible. There’s absolute silence now, so Neal can hear the gasp clearly, and doesn’t - _won’t_ \- look up to see that it’s Archie.

Then the laughter starts, first Cook, then Monty and Kyle, followed by Nichole and Kris’ entire band. Neal hasn’t blushed in a really long time, but now he’s sure the full body blush can be seen even through his pants. They’re that tight.

It’s not until the laughter dies down and low conversations, no doubt about him, start up again that Neal dares to look up and study everyone else in the room. It takes less than a second to realize that everyone, _everyone_ , even Adam - why hadn’t he noticed that before? - are dressed like themselves.

When it dawns on him what’s going on, the red in his face goes from embarrassment to pure anger. Of course, that’s when Adam starts laughing so hard that he has to grab hold of Neal’s arm so that he won’t fall over. “I will fucking _kill you_ ,” Neal says under his breath with a hiss, which only makes Adam laugh even harder.

“Gotta say,” Cook says, startling Neal. “I never thought he’d manage to convince you to put those on. Really don’t wanna know what he had to do to pull it off. You just cost me a hundred bucks.” He waves the dollar bills around before handing them over to Adam, who’s suddenly stopped laughing. “Damn it, Doc, I was gonna take Archie out to dinner tomorrow. I had more faith in you.”

“You,” Neal says, poking Cook in the chest. “I should have known you had something to do with this. I will get even, just you wait.”

Andy is still gawking, frozen to the same spot.  
 **The End**

**Author's Note:**

> Written for mmmfelicious based on the prompt _Tiedam power play_. The pants in question are [these](http://adam-lambert.org/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/adampackage.jpg). Thanks to for finding it for me.


End file.
